For Lucy! [she says, cheerfully. her emotions are all over the place as usual, but that's okay. she goes to the waves, hiking her robes up, and waits for lucy to scoot on over.] You can feed her too, if you want.
[ his emotions are calm in comparison, after all of that; gu yun stands from where he was sitting and wipes some sand off of his silks, getting up to join her and watching the shark move. ]
I'd love to. [ hmmm. ] This beach is the first time I've ever seen a shark up so close, you know.
[ he looks at the fish for a second as it's handed to him, and ends up grinning a little. of all things, it brings back a wash of old memories - goofing around with chang geng while he complained about his yifu's childish behavior. ]
I'd rather chase tigers, I think. [ a little wryly, considering. dragons to the east, tigers to the north - the marquis of order is never at peace.
he tosses the fish out to lucy, with a deadpan - ] Yeet.
[the - well, okay, before anything, the yeet gets her to burst into genuine laughter. she just dissolves into a stream of giggles as lucy munches the fish. it's the kind of laughter that comes when you break tension, when you've had a long day or a long week and you hit one thing, and you just laugh until you cry.]
he watches lucy eat for a moment, and then, without looking, reaches over so his hand bumps gently against lup's free one. a longer moment, before he links their fingers together, and gives her hand a squeeze. his emotions radiate the usual pleased with himself you'd expect from that, but... there's a warmer, softer affection underneath it, too, tinged with concern.
[she hiccups, when she can breathe again, and holds his hand.]
Yeah, you sure are. [a sniff, and then:] Hey, uh. I know I said I wasn't going to be a bummer and I promise I won't after this, but - can I ask you something?
his hand squeezes, too, in reflex - emotions shifting across a wide spectrum. concern, a wariness, a more guarded, fragile vulnerability that is gone nearly as fast as it comes, an absolute sense of curiosity, and of course, affection, too. gu yun takes a moment before he composes his response. ]
... To say the words you have and do the actions you have done, then to think anything otherwise would be quite foolish. So. Of course I will. [ after all, she's never shown him anything but care. not since they've come here, good times, bad, and others.
he wants to know. clearly, he wants to know, but he bites back on it, though cutting the emotional ripple of it back is much harder. ]
[a deep breath. all of his emotions cause sharp reactions in her, stabs of guilt and sadness and fear, a wildfire of things. he says what she does, and she closes her eyes.]
Mmhm. [she just has to take his word for it.] Thanks.
[she brings his fingers up, kissing his knuckles. that little flicker of something stronger, something loving and sweet, words she can't say because she's afraid to.]
[ he really hates this! just so you know!!! gu yun's emotions are much more telling than his facial expression, which stays pretty neutral. that vulnerability is still there, and discomfort and worry come through like a lash, along with a quiet sort of anger that must belong to the place as a whole. something more thoughtful, like he's trying to recall back on their conversations this week, trying to figure out what's going on.
and with that, there's warmth, too - matching. something else unsaid.
he lets her take his hand and kiss at his knuckles, though, and stays quiet, storm all over his brow. ]
...alright. [ trust is such a complex, difficult thing for someone like gu yun - it is so rare for him to give himself over to anyone entirely, always holding his cards close to his chest. and she'll get the sense that he does trust what she's saying, but...something about him is a little more guarded than usual. ] If you say so.
[she sighs, and rubs at her forehead. she doesn't notice, but a few more cracks open up along her skin.]
I shouldn't have said anything. [she mutters, but. she doesn't let go of his hand. too selfish for that. she picks up a fish, and tosses it to lucy, expression just... weary.
her emotions match. she's just - like, depressed, but in that tired, nothing matters sort of way.]
How are you doing? You guys managed a no vote. That's rad.
I just haven't ever had a reason to doubt that. I don't have one now, either.
[ gu yun absolutely does notice the cracks - with his sight strong, it's impossible not to. there's a pause in his emotions, and the worry flares again, obvious and strong, before he sighs, quietly, a sense of tiredness joining it.
he squeezes lup's hand, though, and finds a newly opened crack to run his thumb over it, unworried about any heat, but doesn't take the immediate change in topic. ]
[she knew he wasn't going to take it, and she takes a deep breath.]
I don't know. [that's honest. it's very honest, desperately so.] I don't know. But I have to. My brother - my heart. He's going to die if I don't get back.
[but her resolve falters there, and he can probably feel it.]
he can feel the desperation, too, though. and desperation - desperation's a powerful motivator. love is, too. his emotions shift and roil even if his expression never once changes, from recognition to a fierce empathy. he's going to die if i don't get back. he thinks of a young man, the wide eyed fourteen year old he left behind.
again.
his brows furrow, and questions start coming to the surface - gu yun takes the moment to sort through them all. there's no doubt coming off of him, certainly not in that regard. lup's love for her brother. hell, he's felt it. ]
... Lup. [ quietly. ]
You all have known about that thing -- Xiaohei -- [ the little nickname from the other night for the creature. ] -- since the beginning. Haven't you?
[ he's perfectly calm - his emotions stay that way, too, but there's something underneath it that feels like concern, and that same guarded vulnerability, so, so tender. it's harder to mask during a week where their emotions are spread out like dinner plates. ]
Don't - I'm Wrath. [she can't be lup, it's too - he can probably feel the dissonance she feels, this conversation and being lup, being her, it feels like ramming into an electric fence when she gets too close to it. it hurts. she has to be wrath, to protect any sort of part of herself.]
[ it's not that he doesn't get it, the difference between a name and a title. but everything the marquis of order has done, every hard decision he's ever made, has been made by gu yun, too.
his hand squeezes against hers. not tighter. just. holding on, and for a minute, it twinges of a tiny bit of desperation, too. not for an answer, but for something else entirely. there's another flicker of emotion, like a massive, complicated tangle of feelings, but then it's just -- gone. shut off like a tap. ]
...Were you all planning on throwing us to the wolves to keep it fed?
w6, saturday
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Stick in the mud.
Don't make that face, I'll come kiss those tears away!
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u busy, i'd like to come sit with you
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I'm on the beach.
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i'll be less of a bummer this time, promise
[and she'll go to the beach! she brings a bucket full of fish with her. sometimes you have to feed your pet shark, okay.]
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anyway. here's gu yun! he smiles at wrath when she shows up, and then looks curiously at the fish. ]
For Lucy? Ah, I want to watch.
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I'd love to. [ hmmm. ] This beach is the first time I've ever seen a shark up so close, you know.
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wrath hands gu yun a fish.]
This is not how sharks react normally, so uh. Don't go chasing them if you see them where you came from.
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I'd rather chase tigers, I think. [ a little wryly, considering. dragons to the east, tigers to the north - the marquis of order is never at peace.
he tosses the fish out to lucy, with a deadpan - ] Yeet.
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he watches lucy eat for a moment, and then, without looking, reaches over so his hand bumps gently against lup's free one. a longer moment, before he links their fingers together, and gives her hand a squeeze. his emotions radiate the usual pleased with himself you'd expect from that, but... there's a warmer, softer affection underneath it, too, tinged with concern.
very innocently: ] I'm learning.
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Yeah, you sure are. [a sniff, and then:] Hey, uh. I know I said I wasn't going to be a bummer and I promise I won't after this, but - can I ask you something?
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[ he glances over to look at her, curious and clearly so. ]
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[her grip tightens on his hand.] I'm not going to explain more than that.
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bad
his hand squeezes, too, in reflex - emotions shifting across a wide spectrum. concern, a wariness, a more guarded, fragile vulnerability that is gone nearly as fast as it comes, an absolute sense of curiosity, and of course, affection, too. gu yun takes a moment before he composes his response. ]
... To say the words you have and do the actions you have done, then to think anything otherwise would be quite foolish. So. Of course I will. [ after all, she's never shown him anything but care. not since they've come here, good times, bad, and others.
he wants to know. clearly, he wants to know, but he bites back on it, though cutting the emotional ripple of it back is much harder. ]
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Mmhm. [she just has to take his word for it.] Thanks.
[she brings his fingers up, kissing his knuckles. that little flicker of something stronger, something loving and sweet, words she can't say because she's afraid to.]
Okay, okay. No bummers.
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and with that, there's warmth, too - matching. something else unsaid.
he lets her take his hand and kiss at his knuckles, though, and stays quiet, storm all over his brow. ]
...alright. [ trust is such a complex, difficult thing for someone like gu yun - it is so rare for him to give himself over to anyone entirely, always holding his cards close to his chest. and she'll get the sense that he does trust what she's saying, but...something about him is a little more guarded than usual. ] If you say so.
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I shouldn't have said anything. [she mutters, but. she doesn't let go of his hand. too selfish for that. she picks up a fish, and tosses it to lucy, expression just... weary.
her emotions match. she's just - like, depressed, but in that tired, nothing matters sort of way.]
How are you doing? You guys managed a no vote. That's rad.
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I just haven't ever had a reason to doubt that. I don't have one now, either.
[ gu yun absolutely does notice the cracks - with his sight strong, it's impossible not to. there's a pause in his emotions, and the worry flares again, obvious and strong, before he sighs, quietly, a sense of tiredness joining it.
he squeezes lup's hand, though, and finds a newly opened crack to run his thumb over it, unworried about any heat, but doesn't take the immediate change in topic. ]
Lup, how do you all get to go home?
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I don't know. [that's honest. it's very honest, desperately so.] I don't know. But I have to. My brother - my heart. He's going to die if I don't get back.
[but her resolve falters there, and he can probably feel it.]
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he can feel the desperation, too, though. and desperation - desperation's a powerful motivator. love is, too. his emotions shift and roil even if his expression never once changes, from recognition to a fierce empathy. he's going to die if i don't get back. he thinks of a young man, the wide eyed fourteen year old he left behind.
again.
his brows furrow, and questions start coming to the surface - gu yun takes the moment to sort through them all. there's no doubt coming off of him, certainly not in that regard. lup's love for her brother. hell, he's felt it. ]
... Lup. [ quietly. ]
You all have known about that thing -- Xiaohei -- [ the little nickname from the other night for the creature. ] -- since the beginning. Haven't you?
[ he's perfectly calm - his emotions stay that way, too, but there's something underneath it that feels like concern, and that same guarded vulnerability, so, so tender. it's harder to mask during a week where their emotions are spread out like dinner plates. ]
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Don't - I'm Wrath. [she can't be lup, it's too - he can probably feel the dissonance she feels, this conversation and being lup, being her, it feels like ramming into an electric fence when she gets too close to it. it hurts. she has to be wrath, to protect any sort of part of herself.]
I've known about it from the start. Yes.
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his hand squeezes against hers. not tighter. just. holding on, and for a minute, it twinges of a tiny bit of desperation, too. not for an answer, but for something else entirely. there's another flicker of emotion, like a massive, complicated tangle of feelings, but then it's just -- gone. shut off like a tap. ]
...Were you all planning on throwing us to the wolves to keep it fed?
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Yes. [... grief, guilt, desperation - all kept out of her voice.] But I don't want to. I would rather offer myself.
[what she wants isn't worth this.]
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