Audience: Harrowhark Nonagesimus

[probe]

Comments

[probe]

I am really sorry about that. Like, genuinely.

[a pause.] It's not, uh, an excuse so much as an explanation but my temper has been flaring worse than normal.

[bonetiddies]

You don't have to apologize.

[And she says that not in the tone of someone saying 'do what you want' and stomping off!]

Mine has as well, though I understand you're speaking of something different, and that we ought to discuss that as well. [Like, Gu Yun sort of suggested there's some weird Avatar shit.]

As a disagreement, it really doesn't - matter. I don't always know what to make of the way others treat me, how to react to it. I dislike the perception of childishness, but I'm not angry that you have it so much that it exists. That I've created it.

[probe]

[they rock back and forth on their heels a little.]

I don't really think of you as childish, Harrow. I do think you're a bit emotionally constipated, though, which just, uh - it activates my sibling senses. [huff.] Which again, like, isn't your problem!

... Look, hey, before anything else, I want to show you something, okay? I guess it sort of ties into what you just said you wanted to talk about.

[bonetiddies]

Oh. Well, that's probably true.

[She kind of. . . has no idea how to react to that. She just isn't used to people dealing with her with anything in between open hostility and reverence, so the idea that someone might criticize her despite caring for her is a little hard to get her mind around. Sibling senses. . .]

What did you want to show me?

[probe]

[well, she just goes ahead and pulls her hood down. her eyes are red around the edges, with black sclera and bright red-orange irises, and there are cracks of fire that spread up her neck and face.] My face, as it is right now. You've kind of sort of seen it already, in a way. But. You know!

[bonetiddies]

[She doesn't really seem surprised.]

Gu Yun said it was something like this. Is it painful?

[probe]

Not really. Not unless I get really, really TO'd. [...] What did Gu Yun tell you?

[bonetiddies]

He said you were in a state, when he returned your hat, and it improved matters - you looked closer to how you had in your memories.

Given what I'd seen [Pride] I assume the state he described was the negative effects of the transformation.

[probe]

Oh. Yeah. It gets bad sometimes but uh, I don't know if there's really anything you guys can do about it? It's probably not like this for the others but, uh, for me I just... I felt like I could be stable after I had Taako's hat back.

[bonetiddies]

Do you understand why your items are being lost in a place like that?

[probe]

No, but it sure is fucking annoying!

[bonetiddies]

I know you haven't figured out what those places are. But talking to Molly, my theory is that it's. . .

At the end, all of us felt a sudden urging of hunger, that apparently could only be satisfied by doing something morally reprehensible. Our choice seemed to be between giving into the urge, and death.

For this week's group, Molly described what they felt as a sort of paranoia, but also a sense that no one's needs but their own were real, and they had to get rid of everyone else to get what they wanted. And this urging led them to decide between killing other members of our group, or lying there like a stubborn idiot bleeding from a golf club wound.

In other words, an intense urging to either indulge in gluttony and greed respectively at any cost, or to abstain at great personal cost or even death. The one last week, which appeared to involve White's memories is admittedly an outlier.

[probe]

... You know, that's a good theory, I think? That they, uh - reflected those ideas, I mean. I don't know about White, but we've had a lot of you guys come to us asking about memory shit lately so maybe it has to do with that? [she folds her arms.] I don't think you were wrong to die instead of giving in. Maybe whatever is causing them to happen thought you were wrong, but I don't.

[bonetiddies]

I don't either. I'm not a very nice person, but I'm not going to eat a little girl. [Ugh.] Also, she may have been the ghost of Pride's daughter, which would have been very awkward.

[probe]

[...........] -- Pride has a daughter?

[bonetiddies]

. . . Ah. Perhaps I shouldn't have said anything.

[She feels bad now!!]

Clearly, he values his privacy.

[probe]

Oh - I'm not telling them I know, I uh, I don't do well with being stabbed. I won't tell them you said anything. [... wow.] Wow, someone slept with them. That is... a revelation.

[bonetiddies]

Be nice.

[Pride is actually valid.]

[probe]

[she makes a face. but she will, only because it's harrow.] Well, uh. I'm glad you didn't accidentally eat Pride's daughter. For sure. Whatever happened to the other four... I don't know, I haven't asked. It seems like a real dick move to grab them by the shoulders and be like, tell me about your traumas!

[bonetiddies]

Agreed. It is a real dick move. But they might not know they ought to tell you. Molly was fairly willing to discuss it. Grace perhaps less so.

[probe]

I'll ask Molly about it but uh. I don't know. Sometimes I feel like I say the wrong thing around him a lot. Which I am very unused to, actually!

[bonetiddies]

Really? [This. Baffles her.] As in, he was offended? Are you sure?

[probe]

Not... offended, but maybe uncomfortable. I try to talk about his feelings and he gets squirmy about it. Which I'm not unused to, that's, uh. That's pretty fucking familiar, but I just didn't anticipate it with him.

[bonetiddies]

Oh. That makes more sense. I say almost exclusively terrible things to him and he's never minded, but that I don't think he cares for.

[Hmm. Which is a problem, if she needs to know.]

. . . You are rather forward sometimes, you know. The second time we spoke, you were telling me that you "liked me." I didn't come see you right after, either, because I was afraid of what you'd say. That you would be nice, and I would be unequipped for it. As you've seen, I don't - always know what to do with that.

I don't think he's entirely dissimilar.

[probe]

[she makes a FART SOUND with her mouth.] You antiheroes and your constipation. [like she isn't just as bad about being honest about hers but this isn't about her!!] Or I guess not antihero. It's not tsundere either... maybe Lust knows a better term. Anyway. I know I'm forward. And I'm probably going to not stop that, because I think you guys need a safety net if you want one. I just think, uh, I'm maybe not so great at predicting when to toss it, I guess.