Audience: Gu Yun

[probe]

Comments

[liuli]

I am not. [ god decided to let me live another day and i'm going to make it everyone's problem.png ] I actually rather think I'm alive out of sheer spite.

[ luckily, the nice warm embers of wrath's hands do seem to help a bit. he warms up to the touch eventually, though it's a bit slow, and gu yun flexes his fingers against theirs as it goes, honestly relishing in it. ]

--Also, it doesn't seem very fair, that you can just look us up. Can't we get to know each other the old fashioned way? Love letters, gifts, late night conversations of vulnerability? [ this comes with him batting his eyelashes again. sparkle sparkle. ] Drinking games?

[probe]

Hah! Sounds familiar.

[look, they're about the same size, wrath and gu yun, but this does not stop them from trying to pull him into their lap. at this point it is not even a sexual thing, they're legitimately concerned about his circulation. let them be your portable electric blanket.]

I guess. I don't, uh, wow are late night conversations of vulnerability not my style! But I can get behind a drinking game.

[liuli]

[ that doesn't seem to bother him any - it surprises him, but since the beanbags are wriggly anyway, gu yun gives up and let it happen, since wrath is very warm. and... wrath will notice despite his broad shoulders, gu yun's waist? tiny. little yifu.

he ends up barking a laugh when they finish speaking, though. ] Don't worry - I was joking. I think you and I are of the same mind. [ gu yun would actually rather die than be vulnerable for five seconds about literally anything, ever,

drinking, though! he has mixed drinks about feelings! ] Have any you like to play in particular? I'm starting to learn the world's far wider than I expected it to be, so I'm more of a student than the master I thought.

[probe]

[oh mood, death is a great alternative to feelings.

also gu yun, your waist. please be less of a barbie.]

I've run across a few. There's the one where you guess two truths and a lie, and drink if you get it wrong - but. [they hum.] I'm not that emotionally slutty. You're going to have to work for my tragic backstory like everybody else, no matter how charming you are.

[liuli]

[ isn't it??? emotions are the worst!

which, speaking of - emotionally slutty gets him grinning, and it takes a lot to keep from laughing. however - gu yun looks down like he's shy, looks back up - and then puts on his most boyish, charming smile, eyes twinkling, and finishing it off with a bat of his eyelashes and an innocent: ] You think I'm charming?

[ i want that twink obliterated.png ]

[probe]

[they just - cackle, and push his face away from theirs.]

You ham. [they sound very affectionate when they say this.] Stop! I refuse to be charmed stupid by the human equivalent of a misbehaving puppy! I'm immune to charms and sleep effects!

[liuli]

[ his laughter is bright and genuine, immediately, and he lets wrath push his face away, still cackling, too, clearly delighted. ]

A misbehaving puppy? So you think I'm cute, too? [ he has no idea what a sleep effect is, though he can probably assume. . . either way gu yun's having the time of his life rn. ] I think you're pretty charming yourself.

[probe]

[they pull his hair, teasing.]

You're right, I am charming. I'm very charming. [and then they wrap their arms around his waist to just really up the space heater thing.]

I promise to not intentionally look up things about you.

[liuli]

[ jokes on you thats my kink now no

anyway the space heater thing is really nice, actually, and the hair pull just makes him look even more mischievous. wrath feels extra warm for his already impeccably honed sense of touch (and his own general lack of, you know, warmth), so there's no fuss put up as he's drawn in a little closer, now more or less facing wrath and looking into the void of their hood. ]

Excellent. I'll reveal my [ air quotes ] "tragic backstory" when I feel the time is right. I'm very shy.

[ ?????????????????? ] Perhaps I'll start wearing a mysterious shroud, too. [ he will not, ] Just to level the playing field a bit further.

[probe]

[stop you menace]

You are about as shy as I am. [from this distance, he might see something like small, red dots inside the hood. they blink, every so often.]

You could always ask Envy. They'd probably knit you something.

[liuli]

[ chat: someone kiss the npcs
me: i am running

red eyes.. interesting. gu yun is keenly observant as ever, though his playful, easygoing nature hasn't changed a bit. he frees both of his hands to give a playful tug to the edges of their hood. it's straight down and only lasts a second, not trying to push it back. ] Not shy, hm? Is this just to keep us guessing?

[ envy, knitting... that's weirdly cute... ] I might like that, though. [ he laughs. ] Though I'll confess, I'm not much one for winter wear.

[ aren't you cold all the time? sir? ]

[probe]

[they immediately grab for his hands when he reaches for the hood. it's - not super fast, but it's enough that it's like a panic response. but he doesn't try to push it back, and they take a beat of silence before answering. they don't let go.]

It's just to keep you guessing. I can take it off whenever I want. [they say, after that moment.] ... You should be into winter wear. You're freezing.

[liuli]

[ hm hm. he Sees.

gu yun keeps his hands there, but loosens his grip completely, letting wrath keep a hold on them instead; there's no tension, no attempt to pull it off, nothing. just a bare blip of observation.

then, not a second later, gu yun chirps, utterly shamelessly, a big shit eating grin on his face - ] What can I say? I like showing off my figure.

[ terrible. ]

[probe]

[they snortlaugh, after another pause.]

Well. It is a nice figure, but you won't have a dang figure left if you freeze to death.

[liuli]

Sure I will. I'll just be an incredibly attractive icicle.

[ still a figure!

after a snickering laugh - ] It's always been that way, though. [ gu yun gives a little wiggle of his fingers where his hands are still with wrath's. they're only just now feeling warm - if their hands move away from his at all, the warmth fades fairly quickly. ] I don't know why. Probably too much time eating dirt in the Northern Frontier.

[probe]

[they will just keep a hold, then? they don't like that he's so cold, and they're always warm, so...]

You could just have a case of death disease that you won't let me look up. [they sigh, dramatically. back to normal, like the hood thing didn't just happen.] Northern Frontier?

[liuli]

[ conveniently so does he! wow, they really are on the same wavelength! ]

Maybe I do, maybe I don't. [ guess you'll have to find out! that face says, grinning and high-spirited and shameless. gu yun wiggles his fingers, but doesn't seem to have much objection to this. you can have his hands now. ]

The Northern Frontier. [ he confirms, after a moment. no stories of terrible death disease (?) but he will give up a little info. ] It's where the Black Iron Camp is - the border between the lands of the Heavenly Tribes and Great Liang. My troops are stationed there. Very cold.

[probe]

[terrible, stop running from your feelings.]

Whoa. Your troops - so you're a military guy, right?

[liuli]

[ (runs faster) ]

That's right. [ he draws himself up a bit further, the best one can in a beanbag chair that's really not meant for two people, all very overdramatic as he puts on the proper airs.

ahem. ]

I am the Marshal of the Black Iron Camp, the head of Great Liang's Dark Armored Crows, the Black Eagles, Black Armors, and Black Cavalries, the ever feared, triumphant, and very handsome Marquis of Order - Gu Yun.

[probe]

Jesus, that's a mouthful.

[they sound amused.] I can't give you my full title but be assured there's a king in there somewhere. Maybe an emperor or two.

So I guess that means I'm your boss, now! No takebacks.

[liuli]

[ i swear to fucking god

his whole expression changes, and gu yun raises an eyebrow. ]

Oh? Well.

This humble servant Gu is honored to serve the emperor. [ and he's dipping into a bow the best that he can from this position. you can't tell because of jamjar language, but he uses his most humble pronouns, and is letting his voice drop lower, laying it on thick. ] After all, it is only my duty...

[ gu yun lifts his head just a bit, peering at them through his lashes, now biting his lip as he doesn't hold back on his grin, voice returning to normal. ] ...to serve the emperor of Great Liang, anyway, and I'm fairly sure you aren't him.

[ he sits up properly again, straightening, and there's a beat. ] If you are, I suppose we'll need to have quite the unfortunate talk about filial piety.

[ (laughs weakly in canon) ]

[probe]

[this is really funny.]

Jesus. [hello? don't just use the lower voice.] You don't know, I could be. Maybe I'm on vacation.

You don't even know if I'm a girl or a guy, do you.

[liuli]

[ hm. there's something to address in that about his current feelings on emperor li feng, but more importantly - ]

Does it matter?

[ local bisexual, ]

[probe]

Hah! Hah - no, I guess it doesn't!

[they seem very genuinely pleased by this answer.] Hm. That opens so many new avenues.

[liuli]

[ great liang is a surprisingly open place! usually moreso in the south, but gu yun travels around enough you catch word of all the things, and he decided a while ago he doesn't really care, not to mentioned [redacted] and [redacted]. ]

Oh, does it? [ you can't just say that and not explain wtf ]