GRAVEYARD ✨

[probe]

POPULATION: GHOST TOWN

You die - and then you wake up.

For a second, it feels as though you can't breathe, and then your head breaks the surface. You crawl out of a pool of blood and into a large, crystalline room. Moving images play across the crystal walls, and if you watch close enough, you'll realize that you're seeing the land of the living; a familiar space station with familiar faces. You can watch these images for as long as you'd like - there are several very large benches (as in, you have to climb them to sit on them) around the room for you to rest on while you do.

Regardless of how you died, it seems as though you're not quite gone completely. You're in one piece, at least. That's good news. However, your surroundings are not exactly what you remember.

When you exit the first room, a bleak, empty city sprawls out ahead of you.

The city itself is large. The framework of it seems to tower higher and higher than you can see, up into the black opal sky that shivers and curls every so often. A river entirely made of blood runs through the city, winding around buildings and ending at the crystal room. The most noticeable thing about the buildings themselves is the fact that thorny vines made of pure white steel dig into the walls and floor, cracking the foundations.

The residential building is worn down and old. It's two floors, and has a few small studio apartments built for one or two people to live in. The beds are extremely uncomfortable. It has a communal area downstairs, but the TV is broken, and the couches are torn apart. Sometimes, this building feels obscenely hot in temperature, and smells like rotten eggs.

The grocery store is your typical convenience store. There's a large selection of food in this area, but it all tastes the same - like chalk. On top of this, every so often there will be bloodstains on the walls, the floor, and the displays. They change in size and location, each time you enter the store.

The clothing store is thrifty in nature. All the clothes here are uncomfortable and scratchy, and don't fit quite right. While you're here, time feels... weird. Distorted, almost dreamy. As you're picking out clothes and trying them on (no money needed, just take what you want), you swear you can hear a gunshot in the distance.

Enjoy your time in this city, and remember...your story isn't quite over yet.

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Comments

[bachelorbored]

You brought it up! You challenged my snackitude!

[commedia]

It doesn't mean I need to bite you!

[bachelorbored]

Then you’ll accept my opinion on the matter as a certified local guide! Case closed!

[commedia]

I can't, because you're not a...certified local guide! Believe me!

[bachelorbored]

No! Google doesn’t exist here, so now I make the rules! Believe me, or Bill Gates will inject you full of bee venom!

[commedia]

Who in the world is-? BILL GATES???!

[bachelorbored]

I said what I said!

[commedia]

[WHY IS KAZ LIKE THIS]

If I bite you, will you be quiet about...this Bill injecting venom?!

[bachelorbored]

I’ll consider it, depending on your review of my flesh!

[commedia]

[CRIES ON THE INSIDE]

Where should I, um, bite, then.

[bachelorbored]

I don’t know. Somewhere tasty, I suppose.

[commedia]

Your...shoulder?

[bachelorbored]

I don't really think of the shoulder of anything as a particularly prime cut, though... huh.

This is harder than I thought it would be.

[commedia]

Well, then offer a place if you're such an expert, then!

[bachelorbored]

[he's like

squeezing the sides of his own body?]

Don't rush me! I want the best representation of my sumptuous flavor!

[commedia]

What are you touching? There's nothing there!!

[bachelorbored]

How dare you! My love handles are not to be missed!

[commedia]

I don't know what a love handle is, but you clearly don't have them!

[bachelorbored]

That's it! I've had it with your put-downs!

Bite me on my delicious love handles, asshole!

[commedia]

EXCUSE me?

[bachelorbored]

You heard me! Tons of women have rated them five out of five!

Bing it!

[commedia]

You have to, uh...

[Gestures for Kaz to lift up his shirt??]

Show me where they are?

[bachelorbored]

What?

Oh. Yes, I suppose a partial denuding is critical, here... well, don't get any ideas! You're just here to chow down!

[he lifts his shirt slightly on the right side. no homo.]

[commedia]

[Douman....blushes?]

Please don't say it like that...

[PLEASE...and just...? Bending down?]

Goodness, you really are short.

[bachelorbored]

Rude as hell, and heightest to boot! I'm actually well over the average of men my age, it should be noted!

And stop staring and just get in there! You're making it weird!