No. [She answers immediately, to her own surprise, because she sort of thought she was disappointed. All of her Lyctoral teachers on the Mithraeum were so hateful, aside from the Emperor himself and even he - it pains her to admit it. He spoke so many kind words to her. He said that he thought of her like a daughter. He sat by her bedside during her convalescence. But the words and the actions never lined up with one thing - the Saint of Duty tried to kill her again and again, leaving her broken and traumatized in the aftermath, unable to sleep, and her God never lifted a finger to help her no matter how she begged. And her God had brought her to Canaan House in the first place, led her in her ignorance to committing the cardinal sin, though it seemed to have pained him to have done so.
She. . . would much rather have had a teacher who didn't bother so much with kind words and praise of her genius and access to advanced theorems, but rather one who wanted to teach her how to be a person. She's always had to scramble for that so very on her own.
But no, it doesn't disappoint her. It makes sense. Being "only" a human being. . . is a precious thing. It is so much easier, when you have left humanity behind, to discard the lives of other humans.]
I was surprised, but I also. . . understand now, a little better, why you are so resolute in your understanding of the value of a life.
[Not because he's just a human - plenty of humans are monstrous. She refers, instead, to the easy admission that is what he is and what he ought to be.]
It is as you say; my whole life has been in a lesson in the pursuit of power and perfection at the expense of all else, and it is a terrible thing to live with.
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She. . . would much rather have had a teacher who didn't bother so much with kind words and praise of her genius and access to advanced theorems, but rather one who wanted to teach her how to be a person. She's always had to scramble for that so very on her own.
But no, it doesn't disappoint her. It makes sense. Being "only" a human being. . . is a precious thing. It is so much easier, when you have left humanity behind, to discard the lives of other humans.]
I was surprised, but I also. . . understand now, a little better, why you are so resolute in your understanding of the value of a life.
[Not because he's just a human - plenty of humans are monstrous. She refers, instead, to the easy admission that is what he is and what he ought to be.]
It is as you say; my whole life has been in a lesson in the pursuit of power and perfection at the expense of all else, and it is a terrible thing to live with.