toyska: by <user name="optimisty"> (Let's go have some fun before)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-03 10:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Mm... it depends. [If his opponent was worth it? Most likely. Zhongli, at full strength, probably would've killed him easily, and he'd desperately craved that fight. That he didn't get it bothers him far more than becoming Public Enemy Number 1 of Liyue.] But I haven't accomplished my goals yet.

[He uses those abilities sparingly, because he can. The vast majority of the time, he never has to worry about revealing the layers of his power. To find someone strong enough, not only to challenge him, but to force him to use his full strength, and even then be uncertain of his victory--there's little else that truly satisfies him. A peaceful life is no longer an option for him, and even if it was, he wouldn't want it.]

But accomplishing those goals, and doing what I want to do, requires that kind of immense power. [As did surviving, back when he was a teenager, both in the Abyss and in the Fatui. He knew another way of living, once, but those memories feel like they belong to a different person now. There are many reasons he doesn't use his old name, and that's one of them.] I don't mind the risk, but I'll accept nothing less than being slain by someone strong enough to warrant it.
toyska: (You get everything you want)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 12:14 am (UTC)(link)
It's not something I expect anyone else to understand.

[After all--

"You shall ever be the eye of the storm,"
"And the clashing of steel shall ever accompany you."
"The pitch-black memory of stepping into uttermost darkness,"
"Shall, at last, become the strength by which you will overturn this world."


--who else would understand something like that?]


In any case, that's what makes immortality a tricky subject, from my perspective. [That, and he's seen firsthand the effects of its melancholy. It's just one of so very many things that complicates his feelings about what happened with Zhongli.] But I do enjoy stories from your world. Thank you for sharing it with me.
toyska: by <user name="optimisty"> (We don't need the light)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 03:01 am (UTC)(link)
[It's true--enough talk of grand ideals. He's not here for immortality, and thinking of it draws him too close to trains of thought he'd rather not board.

So he smiles, nodding knowingly in their direction.]


Except your face, hm? [But his voice is light, and he lifts a hand before they can respond.] Don't worry, I'm just teasing.

[He literally wears his Fatui mask in his hair all the time, he has no room to talk.]
toyska: https://bbs.mihoyo.com/ys/accountCenter/postList?id=247406968 (I don't mind what they say)

1/2

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 03:04 am (UTC)(link)
toyska: by <user name="optimisty"> (Stars fill up my head)

2/2

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 03:04 am (UTC)(link)
[TOUCHES FOREHEAD TIREDLY]
toyska: (I don't know what you had in mind)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 03:34 am (UTC)(link)
[WHAT HAPPENED TO "LET'S FORGET ABOUT IT" LUST.

But he lowers his hand, looking thoughtfully at them. Whatever it is he's thinking, though, he apparently decides it isn't worth saying, so he shakes his head a little.

Instead, simply--]


I accept that. [...] Thank you for being concerned about me anyway.

[He really hadn't expected it, but then, he hadn't actually expected it out of anyone. But it probably says more about Lust than it does about him.]
toyska: (Look so pretty)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 04:01 am (UTC)(link)
[Listen in his defense he didn't know about HK-47 at the time, and he's not 100% convinced the murder robot was telling the truth, but even he had a moment of "oh I can see why that might've been offensive now"

But words like those--he can't help but turn his gaze away, covering any awkwardness with a drink of his tea.

Foolish. Truly caring about people in a place like this, when you're likely to wake up to their corpse at any moment. When everyone is here seeking their own power, regardless of what form it may take, and would likely do anything to get it. It's not cynicism, as far as he's considered--just a realistic understanding of the chess board.

What kind of player gets attached to their game piece?

What kind of pawn trusts the players of the game?

It's all foolishness. Every bit of it.

But he doesn't need to argue, when Lust already knows perfectly well how he feels. The fact that he kind of wants to, to shake some sense into them, is dangerous enough. So, instead--]


Will you tell me something, if you can?
toyska: (If you ask me to change I dunno if I can)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 05:44 am (UTC)(link)
[He tilts his head slightly.]

...If you were here, in my place. What would you wish for?
toyska: by <user name="optimisty"> (It's a long way down)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-04 05:57 am (UTC)(link)
[To his credit, he simply tilts his head in acknowledgment. Though he does glance at them again, after.]

...but not forever? [Gentle, curious. Opening the door, but giving them the chance to close it again, if they want.]
toyska: Qing11502143 @ twitter (Are you insane like me?)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-05 12:31 am (UTC)(link)
[Me frowning deeply the MRI scanner inves and also this thread

But Childe doesn't know about that yet, so. He's just listening.]


What is it you want to do?
toyska: by <user name="optimisty"> (It's a long way down)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-05 06:03 am (UTC)(link)
Mm, I see.

["HA HA LOSER" he scoffs-- no I'm kidding. In fact, he just seems rather contemplative, like he's remembering something from a long time ago. But whatever it is, he doesn't seem inclined to bring it up.

Instead--]


You should sing for us one day.
toyska: (You get everything you want)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-05 07:10 am (UTC)(link)
Of course. I love performances.

[This is actually true]
toyska: (You know I can't stop)

[personal profile] toyska 2021-03-05 04:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I'll look forward to it, then.